‘Recollections in my head’
Yeah, that’s just so truth that we are unable to judge our own doings. I think I’m realizing it now…
Some time ago, in vain and drunk I did something desperate. I don’t feel like describing it. But it seems that the price of my pride, instead of bringing future problems, at first seemed to hurt many people… but instead might have saved my friend from getting into shit he didn’t really want to get into, and saving another important to me person from potential pain. Maybe it brought happiness to me, too? Time will show…
Anyway, I don’t write often here. I’ve realized I don’t enjoy sharing my predictions, hopes and plans anymore – I keep them for myself, maybe afraid of spoiling them by even mentioning them. And once they’re done, I don’t feel like describing them either. And I don’t have time. I shall do my best to change these.
I’m haunted by thoughts ‘what would have happened if…?’. I guess my subconsciousness doesn’t like the fact, that for the first time in few years, everything seems more stable then ever, and it’s no longer a “sea of possibilities”, but rather a river, that flows, but can’t change direction too much…
I will see.
